The Petty Elf Daily | North Pole Gossip Blog by Red Alpha — Christmas Humor

🎃 The cobwebs aren’t down yet, and the elves are already on overtime. As soon as the last pumpkin went out, Santa declared it “Official Christmas Season.” Translation: chaos, caffeine, and hiring panic.

💆♀️ After weeks of North Pole drama, Mrs. Claus has officially hit her limit. She’s declared a “Spa Emergency” — ordering mandatory facials, peppermint steam therapy, and a full-day moratorium on elf nonsense. Honestly? Leadership goals.

💤 The elves have officially turned exhaustion into a sport. With deadlines closing in, they’ve launched the first-ever Sleep Deprivation Olympics. Categories include “Most Consecutive Hours Awake,” “Fastest Nap,” and “Best Emotional Breakdown

🦌 The Reindeer Union just announced “strict flight boundaries” — meaning no overtime, no late deliveries, and absolutely no night flights without cocoa breaks. Santa calls it mutiny. The reindeer call it “work-life balance

🛠️ What was supposed to be a “routine midnight sleigh test” turned into the North Pole’s loudest oops of the season. Two reindeer are in therapy, Santa’s insurance premium skyrocketed, and the sleigh’s GPS is still saying “recalculating"