The Petty Elf Daily | North Pole Gossip Blog by Red Alpha — Reindeer
⭐ Day 71 — Sparkles Starts a Search Party (Badly)
Posted by Ruben Escalona on
Sparkles has officially run out of patience. Today she launches a “highly organized” search party for the missing groom and his bachelor squad… which mostly involves crying, yelling, and scaring volunteers. Santa, wisely, pretends to be very, very busy.
👀 Day 67 – Sparkles Knows Something’s Off
Posted by Ruben Escalona on
👀 Fourteen days until the wedding, and Sparkles has entered detective mode. The groomsmen are acting weird, the groom keeps “running errands,” and something about peppermint schnapps whispers betrayal.
🎄 Day 34 – Workshop Fire Drill Fiasco
Posted by Ruben Escalona on
🔥 The “safety drill” turned into a full-blown emergency when elves mistook smoke for s’mores. No one burned — except our pride (and one tinsel cart).
🎄 Day 31 – Elf New Year’s Resolutions (That Won’t Last)
Posted by Ruben Escalona on
The Petty Elf Daily North Pole’s #1 Source for Petty News • Daily Dispatch 🎄 Day 31 — Elf New Year’s Resolutions (That Won’t Last) It’s that magical time again — when elves make promises they’ll forget by mid-January. 📝✨ The annual Resolution Board just went up in the breakroom, and it’s already a masterclass in delusion and denial. 🏋️ “I’ll Stop Eating So Many Cookies” Said by the same elf who has frosting under both thumbs *right now.* The cookie jar in the lounge audibly laughed. 💻 “No More Gossip During Work Hours” We tried this one last year....