💘 Day 54 — Mistletoe & Mayhem: The North Pole Dating App Disaster

Love is in the frosty air… and it smells like regret. 💅❄️

To “boost morale,” HR just launched *Mistletoe & Mayhem* — the first (and probably last) North Pole dating app. Within minutes, the algorithm went rogue, matching elves with coworkers, snowmen, and one confused nutcracker.

📱 The App’s Questionable Algorithm

The questionnaire included, “How do you feel about commitment?” and “Do you own reindeer?” Sparkles matched with himself. Pep matched with his ex’s Secret Santa. I matched with a penguin who says he’s “emotionally unavailable but seasonally dependable.” Tempting.

💋 HR Crisis of the Week

HR didn’t expect elves to use the app *at work.* By noon, the workshop was half swiping, half gossiping. Someone even started a new tag: #ElfTinderFails. Santa called an emergency meeting titled *“Boundaries & Bandwidth.”*

🧸 Meet the Misfits

A few mysterious profiles appeared under “Long-distance matches.” Usernames like *“BrokenJack-in-the-Box94”* and *“ToyWithTrustIssues”* popped up. HR says it’s a “technical glitch.” I say we’ve officially connected with **The Land of Petty Misfits.** And honestly? I’m intrigued.

They can shut down the app, but you can’t unsee that half the elves are apparently “looking for something jolly but toxic.” The Petty Elf may be single — but at least she’s self-aware. 💘✨

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Stay shady,
– The Petty Elf 🧝‍♀️