🍫 Day 39 — The Great Cocoa Shortage

Panic has officially struck the North Pole: we’re out of cocoa. 😱

The main dispenser in the breakroom gave its final hiss this morning, followed by what witnesses describe as a “death gurgle.” Morale dropped 73% instantly. Productivity? Don’t ask.

☕ The Aftermath

Elves lined up with empty mugs like it was the Great Depression of 1932. Pep tried to melt chocolate bars in a candle warmer. Sparkles started a black-market “cocoa club.” We’ve lost control.

🎅 Santa’s Intervention

Santa called an emergency meeting and suggested… tea. TEA. You could hear the collective gasp across the workshop. “It’s herbal,” he said. “It’s soothing.” So is a nap, big guy — but you don’t see us replacing caffeine with sleep.

📦 The Investigation

Supply says the cocoa shipment was “rerouted.” Rumor says the Reindeer Union intercepted it for their spa smoothies. I say we riot. Peacefully. With marshmallows.

The North Pole is one burnt kettle away from collapse. If we don’t get a refill soon, the next headline you’ll read is: *‘Elves Revolt, Demand Mocha Representation.’*

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Stay shady,
– The Petty Elf 🧝‍♀️