⭐ Day 72 — Misfit Toy Challenges (Bachelor Edition)

This morning in the Land of Petty Misfit Toys, the locals announced an official decree: “Let the trials begin!” 🧸⚔️ Unfortunately, the bachelor squad was the only group available to volunteer. Or… be volunteered.

To earn “information” about the realm, the toys created a series of challenges. None of which were reasonable. All of which were televised internally like a chaotic reality show.

💪 Trial #1 — Arm-Wrestling an Angry Teddy Bear

The first challenge featured a teddy bear named Bruiser McFluff — a discontinued prototype known for:
• poor stitching
• excessive muscles
• and unresolved rage issues

Spruce volunteered. Spruce regretted volunteering.

Bruiser slammed his arm down so fast Spruce said, “Did I black out?” Yes. Yes, he did.

🧦 Trial #2 — The Goblin Sock Puppet Maze

Frostbite Jr. and Shortstack entered a labyrinth guarded by goblin sock puppets who hissed insults like:
“Your haircut is seasonal!” “Your emotional stability is backordered!”

Every dead end featured another puppet ready to roast their life choices. Shortstack cried once. Frostbite Jr. cried twice.

They escaped by bribing a sock puppet with a single gumdrop. Cheap date.

🥃 Trial #3 — Resisting the Shot-Glass Elves

The final trial was psychological warfare. Enter: the Shot-Glass Elves.

Small. Chaotic. Peer pressure with feet.

They offered the bachelor squad glowing mystery shots, chanting: “ONE OF US! ONE OF US!”

The boys refused. The elves chanted louder. The boys caved instantly.

Glitterbeard asked for seconds. Of course he did.

🎉 The “Prize”

After completing (or surviving) all three trials, the Misfit Toys granted them a prize:

“You may now stay for another day.”

Not helpful. Not encouraging. But extremely on-brand for this realm of petty chaos.

The bachelor squad is exhausted. Bruised. Glitter-filled. And no closer to going home.

Meanwhile, Sparkles' search party leaves at dawn. She’s ready. They’re not. ⭐✨

---

Stay shady,
– The Petty Elf 🧝♀️