🎄 Day 15 — Cocoa Machine Meltdown

This morning the cocoa machine gave up on life. Steam, sparks, and one traumatized marshmallow later—total shutdown. ☕🔥

You’d think it was the apocalypse the way elves reacted. Productivity dipped 70% because apparently no one can build toys without hot chocolate in hand.

⚡ The Malfunction

Reports say someone tried to “hack” the settings for extra whip mode. Now it only dispenses lukewarm cocoa with a side of mechanical whine. Relatable.

👀 Black Market Brews

Desperate elves started selling homemade cocoa from thermoses at 5 marshmallows a cup. Capitalism is alive and thriving in the North Pole.

🎅 Santa’s Statement

Santa promised a new machine “by next week.” Translation: he’s waiting for Prime shipping again. Until then, morale is officially at “lukewarm.”

Anyway, I’m starting my own brand: Petty Brew™. First flavor? “Bitterness with a hint of marshmallow.” Investors welcome.

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Stay shady,
– The Petty Elf 🧝‍♀️